He must wear specially made pants to house these enormous balls

Just try to fathom the nuts it takes for Charles Koch to write an editorial decrying "crony capitalism" in the United States. But don't worry, the Koch brothers aren't as nasty as you've been led to believe:

I am confident that businesses like ours will hire more people and invest in more equipment when our country's financial future looks more promising. Laying the groundwork for smaller, smarter government, especially at the federal level, is going to be tough. But it is essential for getting us back on the path to long-term prosperity.

Once wages get low enough and benefits no longer exist in the private sector they'll consider hiring you. What a couple of guys.