Austin Bay is such a massive assclown.

Back to that Austin Bay piece, I cannot let this slide. Bay starts his column with this bullshit.

Victory in war is tough to define.

No, it's actually, Austin -- it's not.

Victory in WWII? Not hard to define.
Victors of WWI? Allies.
Victory in the Russo-Japanese War? Wasn't the Russians.
Civil War? A clear victory for the Union.

How about the Napoleonic Wars? I'd say when Napoleon was sent to St. Helena, that sucker was pretty much over.

War of 1812? United States.
How about the Revolutionary War? Ditto.
Mexican-American War? Ditto.

Gulf War I? Saddam lost. Not hard to define.

We can do this all day. Who won the American-Indian wars? Who won the French and Indian War?

All pretty easy. No ambiguity at all.

Memo to Bay: victory in Iraq is tough to define, because you can't win totally pointless wars. You only win them by not fighting them.

In addition, Iraq isn't a stand-in for the stuff we typically call "war" because it's an occupation/ insurgency combined with a sectarian civil war, sprinkled with healthy doses of fundamentalist terrorism and foreign meddling. No "victory" here -- for anyone. Especially the United States.

Moron.