"Jenna Bush's Federally Protected Wetlands Now Open for Public Drilling."

From Gelf's interview with Onion writer, Todd Hanson:

GM: How much are you going to miss George W. Bush?

TH: None.

GM: Not even for comedy purposes?

TH: You only write satire about things because you can't stand them so much that you want them to change. So, no, I won't miss him. That's like somebody writing a satire about death and disease, and asking them, "Would you feel bad if death was eliminated and disease was cured forever?"